I am watching the live coverage of the Masjid Al Harram in Makkah while writing this post and I remember the time my husband brought me there after a couple of weeks after our marriage. We didn’t go for honeymoon and travel to the beautiful places and beaches in the world like the newly-wed couple does. Instead, we packed our things and travelled to Makkah for Umrah and paid a visit to Madinah. It was my first time. It was his nth time. He told me, bringing me there is the top in his list after getting married.
We are a product of an interracial marriage. I love my husband unconditionally but differences are inevitable. Most people say that opposites attract, but for me, two people have chemistry because they acknowledge each others differences. They know how to compromise and give way to each other. They respect each other.
My parents didn’t say anything against my marriage but I felt that they were a little bit scared. It’s not that they don’t care for me, to allow me to a such marriage but because I know they trust me. They just advised me to think about the possible consequences before engaging myself in it. Before we got married, we’ve been praying for Istikharra. I believed nobody can tell me what is the right thing to do except Allah. If this marriage is for the goodness of both of us, He will facilitate everything for us. And He did. Alhamdulillah!
It’s been two years, quiet young I know, and we are still adapting to each other.
He is an Arab, I am not.
Learning Arabic is not only to communicate with my husband but for the main purpose of being able to read and understand the Holy Qur’an. Unfortunately, until now I am not fluent in speaking Arabic even the slang or colloquial. Many times I was put in the situation when I was with his friend’s wives and I ended up being out of place. Although they tried to talk to me in English, they told me it’s just difficult for them. Well, so it is for me that’s why I’m still trying to learn Arabic.
Since I am a food lover, adapting to their cuisine is never been difficult to me. I love their food especially their sweets. I tried to learn how to make their meals so I can serve it to my husband. There are times I am craving for my traditional food also so I will end up preparing both cuisines in the same day. We didn’t have issues about food at all because we are not forcing each other, instead we respect each other’s preferences.
For me, one of the advantage of interracial marriage is having the opportunity to learn new things of different background and different perspective.
Sadly, when the families are not accepting the marriage, it’s making things complicated. When racism occurs, marriage is shaken. And I always have an answer for this. They cannot reject or despise this marriage because this is the will of Allah. This marriage is the fate He has given to these couple. He is the One who facilitated this union. My husband once told me, if Allah doesn’t want us to get married, it will not be facilitated even if we try every possible way. And I agree. Do you?